Dealing With The Perfectionist In You
If you have a perfectionist personality, it is not something you have to fix. Instead, you can choose to proactively manage it so it does not manage you.
What is a perfectionist personality?
People who have what I call a perfectionist personality are people who believe so strongly that there is only one path to getting a task or job done correctly that they are hesitant to delegate or allow others to use their unique strengths and talents to handle it.
Indicators of perfectionist personality include:
Doing everything yourself rather than letting others handle things.
Getting impatient or anxious when others take the initiative.
Having the thought, “I have to do everything myself if I want it done right!”
Using the word “should” when describing how things get done.
Being so overwhelmed doing other people’s work that you don’t get your own work done.
Fear of delegation.
As a manager or leader, an unrecognized perfectionist personality leads to not growing and developing your team. You may be seen as a micromanager. And because the people around you don’t have the opportunity to use their unique strengths, talents, and expertise, they often move onto opportunities where they can.
A client recently asked me, “How do I get rid of my perfectionist personality?”
Here’s The Hard Truth About Perfectionist Personality
You can’t get rid of it. Instead, you must learn to recognize it and hack the process.
Most often “the perfectionist” comes out when you are feeling vulnerable, or a need to protect your reputation. Vulnerability creates the best conditions for the perfectionist personality to rise up.
Reread the indicator bullet points above. Do any of these sound familiar to you?
If so, those are your indicators that your perfectionism has shifted from a trait that helps you be successful, to a trait that holds you back. When you were an individual contributor, your perfectionism likely served you well. As a manager and leader, it will hold you back.
As a manager and leader, your value to the company is not only in getting tasks done to a high standard, but also in how you develop and grow the members of your team. Your team can’t grow if you are convinced that your way is the right way 100% of the time.
There are times when things must be done a certain way.
Things like accounting processes, or how tax returns are completed, have a definite set of rules and steps. Your job is to be alert for situations where it’s more appropriate to set boundaries rather than dictating exactly how something must be done.
Think of it like bumper bowling. The bumpers are there so you don’t throw the ball completely off the lane and cause damage and chaos for other bowlers. Your job is to provide the bumpers for those who are doing the task so they can stay in the right lane and be safe from causing damage and chaos as they learn.
The perfectionist personality can’t be “cured”. It is part of who you are. But the question I want you to ask yourself is, “In what ways does the perfectionist personality not serve me?”
Does it cause conflict in important relationships?
Does it hold others back from learning?
Does it mean you take on tasks that could be delegated?
Is the perfectionist in you holding you back?
If yes, I can help. Engaging with me in a coaching and mentoring relationship can help you to recognize, hack, and perform at a top level, despite the urge for control that the perfectionist in you believes you need to have.
Click here to schedule a time to learn more today.