How I'm Handling Unanswerable Questions

If you are a boss, supervisor, leader, business owner, or people manager of any kind, you are likely facing a deluge of unanswerable questions — and wondering how you can answer with honesty and integrity while continuing to build trust and maintain employee engagement.

“Will there be layoffs?”
“What’s happening with our project funding?”
“Are we going back to work in the office?”

Unanswerable questions are particularly challenging.

• As humans we have a strong desire to help people get relief from emotional discomfort. Few things are as uncomfortable as the unknown. Especially when it impacts safety, financial security, or health.

• We have an inherent desire to avoid looking like we don’t know what’s happening. This drives us to provide answers to questions even when we don’t know the answer.

• We seek opportunities to reassure our own fears through dialogue with others so sometimes we react to unanswerable questions with what we hope will be true. In other words, we sugar coat the truth.

Trust is the foundation of connection. 

Connection is essential for workplaces and teams where motivation, engagement, and pride are present. Trust is built one conversation at a time and one experience at a time. Trust is destroyed in the same way.

And we all know that during challenging times, connection and trust are essential to fulfilling the mission of the organization.

Here’s a proven framework for answering the unanswerable.

Use this when you need to provide answers during uncertainty. We teach the framework to all our clients, I use it myself and here it is for you to use:

• Here is what I know.
  The content here is always fact-based

• Here is what is still unknown.
  This includes all the stuff people are wanting to hear for which there are no facts

• Here is what I can’t talk about.
  This includes personnel issues, legal issues, HIPPA concerns, gossip, and leadership decisions not yet ready for sharing.

Download The Framework Here. Share It With Your Team.

https://lp.ncdsolution.com/unanswerable-questions

There are variations of challenging dialogues.

Depending on the level of leadership you operate in, you may be responsible for many planned communications about tough subjects such as at all staff meetings. This is a great framework within which you can deliver those types of messages.

At times, unanswerable questions catch you off guard. 

We call these surprise dialogues and they’re often when we get into the most trouble. If we in fact don’t have an answer, our amygdala is likely to process that as fear or danger and cause us to have an automatic reaction to get us out of danger. This is when we use phrases such as “Don’t worry. It will all be fine”. Or “Don’t be concerned. I will do everything I can to take care of it for you.”

While these answers may temporarily make us feel like we helped the person, the reality is that we may not be able to actually make it fine for them. When they get that news, trust will likely be negatively impacted.

The best way to prepare yourself to stay centered and focused on facts, even in surprise dialogues, is to practice the framework. A great way to practice is to simply brainstorm a list of the most unanswerable questions you anticipate having to deal with and run them through the framework.

The cornerstone of solid working relationships is always truth and authenticity.

The organizations and companies that thrive are the ones who are intentional in how they communicate with and develop the working relationships with their people. 

P.S. As a leader, manager, or parent, you may be facing some unprecedented challenges. 

From time to time, leaders and managers face acute challenges and need support to determine an effective plan of action. In those times, you might feel isolated or stuck, and it can feel like a fight to think clearly about what to do next.

You may not be currently working with a coach, but need help working through a right now challenge. Something acute that is holding up a project, affecting your team, or threatening the mission of your organization.

If you are not sure what to do next, please schedule a free call with me, I’d love to help you: https://ncdsolution.com/beth